BLU

If we could not forget, we would never be free from grief.
Bahya Ibn Paquda

PERSPECTIVE and just one year

Perspective it is just a simple thing that change angles and then change senses. Ines Blu Rodrigues in “Life”

What can I ever say today?
Happy Birthday! Happy Birthday for your 32 years old and goodbye! It is a goodbye to this old perspective that blocked me to write, that blocked me from stopping to think … the 6th December I didn’t celebrate… I did not thought about my adventure trip of 2007 and then ... when I put myself into that plane… One year is enough. The perspective is changing. It’s like Joana’s “new construction”, one side it seems just one building and then we turn the house around and “voila” there is two buildings! Water has passed and I do not see it as before, it is not a question of being a coward it just a question of being human… What fits it fits what doesn’t fits will just never fits!

Why I do not celebrate?

Why I don’t think about “I put myself in Plane”? Why I wrote what I wrote one year ago and I just walked through without one minute reflexion of that 4 days…I did millions of strategies, I wrote 3 books, I watched coincidences, I dreamed with the opened eyes, I believed in something external to me, because I didn’t like what my heart was crying: the failure, I have this the ability to work, to sell houses, to buy another one! rebuilding, redrawing, but the page it is still not white, I am drawing over… I think I will move on, but where? To something greater than an ideal? To a trip, a long one? The trip of escaping again the reflexion, to escaping the cold of the icecube I decided to put inside of the freezer one year ago, because it is too hard to drink that cold water, because it hurts? Because I didn’t cry enough or to much inside of my lungs? And a women like me do not cry… I move on, yes I move on, but moving with a prisoner iron ball around the left foot it is not freedom
Bookfairs, books, projects, 20 meeting per day, sports, fitness, good food,more more more I can manage I can manage I can manage I can manage…. Uau! I think I wrote before that the definition of insanity is to do the same thing over and over again and expect things to change! I should sing more, again, to be drunk of the pleasure of being in love for one music, for the words of a song that make me UAUUUUUUUUU, the ones I follow…. The one
Happy Birthday, I love you, I really do. Now its time to stop rewinding to press stop! And review that trip that “voyage” that changed my life!
The 9th December I received two books, one about a love story with a bad ending another one about a man that left everything to go travel around Asia… The meaning of that two books was that I lived I beautiful love story…without the ending “and lived happily ever after”, and the trip that I did physically and interiorly … without those two stories I was not the person I am today… but it has a beginning a middle and an end! It is time to close the books, to create the ability to go there and watch it and read it again but with the distance we give to the book, a pick up and put down on a shelve… it is there, it is part of us, but is there…to tell
Its like the picture in the MAM in S.Paulo…pencils make a new perspective NEW LIFEEEEEEE